Freely, I’ve Given You Only My Questions*


I like to bid farewell to the past year by turning on the lights of my small Christmas tree and listening to the music of Dean Martin and Frank Sinatra. I like to welcome what is ahead of me with joy. This year, just around this time, something really heartbreaking happened. As always, I tried to go deep within myself, my feelings and my thoughts. I believed that the pain would subside the more I gave myself permission to experience the sadness. And that’s actually what happened. There was light at the end of every tunnel after all. And with all that was happening, I thought about this past year. The happiness, the disappointments, the new people I met who were like gifts, the magic of spontaneity, the weight of anxiety, the burden of judgment.

I asked myself what I wanted to change and what I wanted to stay the same. I planted the seeds in my mind. The ones that would stay, the ones that would go, the ones that would come.

Everything was illuminated all of a sudden. Lighter. Better.

I wish a happy new year where we find the strength and the light that we need through the answers we give to our own questions.

Begüm

*From Bertolt Brecht’s “Questions” poem.

Translated by Talya Arditi

Comments are closed.